Who are you, Richard Steel?

Who are you Richard Steel?
Where are you now that your house is only 12 feet by 12, your name etched on the wall for all to see, perched atop the city of the departed.
A pair of black boots by the side of the trail, recently abandoned,
exited or waiting for a weary traveler's feet to return.
Wind blows across wide waters.
Trains move slowly over on beams of concrete blocks.
A child's make-believe world comes to life, comes from life.
Solid, unmoved, created.
I find you beautiful.
A stark contrast, standing resolutely, telling waters to move around you.
I'm looking at life through ornate white iron fences, petite white flowers cluster around solitary black lamps.
Riding against the wind both ways, but a joy in the heart.
Ride on.
Breathe in a rare freshness.
Who are you Richard Steel?
Who are you Lindsay Craft?
Are you busy building a shed to house this decaying body?
That stone house doesn't matter now, does it Richard?
Did your life really matter?
Who are you?
Who am I?
Am I riding along the waters or am I just letting them pass me by?
Sometimes I sit and watch.
Sometimes I ride along beside.
And sometimes I stay home and curl up on my bed.
But do I ever really do more than dream of jumping in head first?
Or am I busy building my miniature castle on a hill?
Trying to reach to heaven as I dig my own grave deep in the cold earth?

I Choose to Believe.

I need a break from my own mind.
Can't I shut it off for a day?
"Just sing."
Attacked by evil.
When you're on the high mountaintop,
he's there telling you to throw yourself down.
He told Christ that his father would catch him,
but he tells you that you don't even have a real father.
He tells you that you're chasing invisible dreams.
He tells you that believing in God is just a consolation for your soul,
just something people make up to make them feel better about life.
When you feel strong,
it's no surprise that it's followed by weakness.
But I will not let discouragement get the best of me.
I have faith in what I don't yet see.
This is what I choose to believe.
This is what I choose to know.
I will persevere.
I will have patience.
I will continue to trust my God.
Who else do I have but You?

Not interested

It all starts out with a little kiss and then three years of your life have passed and you realize you've been living like you're married and then you finally admit that you're not quite right for each other- although you love them more than anyone else you've ever been with... and then you go through a divorce of the heart and well, frankly... I'm not interested. I don't want you to get the wrong impression- the way I feel is not reactionary (although it does have to do with my past)... I can't wait to throw myself wholeheartedly into someone but I'm not interested in just finding someone to pass the time with- I'm quite content passing the time with myself and my dear (very dear) friends...and might I add... my God.